Oh, if walls could only talk; if bricks could whisper and if only we could decipher time's messages captured in starlight. If only.
And what if a year could tell tales? What if a year such as 2014 could be summarized as one would hear a State of the Union address? What would this year in the universe represent? To all of us?
To me?
I have written here my life and the Matthias Building. I am lying if I say it is only a building. It is not. Not to me.
2014.
What possible words could I conjure to paint the picture and what possible message would I wish to send? What possibly could I wish to make anyone understand? What would it matter anyway? I tell you what. My path has been a testimony to something greater than oneself. I have never ever messed up, screwed up, rejoiced, fallen, dusted myself off, and risen so much as I have this past year. I have done the most unbelievable things. (Some I do not wish to own up to, to tell you the truth). I have been stupid. I have been wise.
I have learned.
And.....I probably have not learned sufficiently because I have a sneaky suspicion that my 'oops' moments are not a thing of the past. But dear God, I would not change one moment. Please note: Would not wish to relive the exact stupidest moments either (yeah, I know).
In 2014 I began a business. In 2014 I bought a building I love. In 2014..... In 2014 I spoke in front of city officials. In 2014 I gave my first and hopefully only interview.
In 2014 I checked on a building almost daily. In 2014 I scraped windows late at night.
In 2014 I fell flat on my face. Many times. Many, many times.
But I learned two big lessons among many, from this building. (Did I mention this building I love is three floors in total, seven thousand square feet each floor for a total future taxable commercial entity of twenty-one thousand square feet?). The first lesson was personal: When you love something, when you are passionate-out-of-your-mind-don't-want-to-die-without-knowing,....well, I give it my all, in a case such as that. I take pictures, daydream and do many foolish things.
And then.....Then, a person might just come up with a viable business plan, a proposal, and decide to fight for that vision. Finally, a person might also just realize...a) a few people might wish to see you make it (jump up and click your heels - no, I am serious), b) a few people might not wish to see you make it (in such cases - see (a)...except.....jump up twice as high and show them and yourself that you can not only click your heels, but, because you have to anyway, you can not only click your heels, but glaze windows at the same time, thank you very much.
Most of all a person might realize that she falls in love with her dream over and over. It's a good thing too because the path is long and without a map. But I have heard those are the best kind of trips.
2014? Thank you. (I know...where is the second lesson? There isn't a second. There is only one....)
From this horrible photo, (photo quality doesn't matter - the outline caught my eye) when the snow fell, accumulating to a degree on the roof which outlined in white against the dark blue night sky, I saw what might be the look of the new roof. I think it will be fine...
Happy New Year. "Thank you" just does not seem to even come close to the gratitude I feel...
Love,
Stephanie at the Matthias Building
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And, sometimes, I find life immensely satisfying as I look west, imagining - sometimes working at the same time, but thanking God for....huge sidewalks next to the most handsome building....ever...
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